A Short Essay on Assurance
I keep looking to myself for confirmation that I am a Christian. Looking to myself for proof. Being terrified that it's all a farce. Today God reminded me to stop looking at myself. I will never find salvation there. Salvation is found in God alone. If I examine ME, I will always find doubt, fear, impure motives, desire to be my own god and go my own way, failure. If I examine GOD, I will always find forgiveness, love, grace, redemption. In the words of Paul in Romans 7, "I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature." I am never going to find contentment, peace, and joy in myself. For, my inner self is wrought with decay. The burden of salvation lies with Jesus, and he paid that cost on a cross once and for all. It is finished. All that's left for me is to surrender, basically to say, "I give up!" And I have done that. Salvation does not mean the end of spiritual wrestling. It is actually the beginning. Christianity is hard.